Merry Christmas!

Dear Santa,
This letter may come as a surprise to you, I'm not sure if you have ever recieved one like it, but as a mother I feel it is my duty to write it.

Please do not come to our house on Christmas.

Allow me to explain...My three year old daughter is terrified of you. In her words: "I just can't like him!"

(I think it has something to do with your beard.)

So deep is her dislike of you that her Daddy is under strict orders to punch you in the nose should you attempt to enter the house. For your own safety, I suggest you stay away.
She may change her mind when she is older, but for now she is convinced that you TAKE presents, instead of BRINGING presents. And that is definitly scary when you're only three years old. You understand, I'm sure.

I'm sorry for any extra trouble this may cause you. We have bought her plenty of presents and her grandparents have as well. Maybe next year?

Until then...

Me